Hopefully everyone is having a restful summer. We here at Silent Majority sure are in our various positions. Also: best of luck to those sitting for the bar!
We just wanted to update the fair Ave Maria School of Law community on the recent actions of our all too public and too loud Senator emeritus, affectionately known as Hammy.
Last reported by Al Jazeera, Hammy was seen somewhere around the Pakistan/Afghanistan border training for the upcoming school year/campaign.
Sen. Hamilton was reported by Al Jazeera as being in high spirits after his crushing election loss. The Senator explained, "Yeah, I realize that I only got 8 votes of the two hundred and twenty plus eligible voters. Well, 6 if you don't count my vote and my VP's vote. But lots of great leaders began with 3% or less of the popular vote and look what they managed to accomplish?"
Senator Hamilton mentioned that his summer camp retreat was giving him time to catch up on some reading and writing. Students may be surprised to learn that under the pen name Andrew MacDonald, Senator Hamilton is an accomplished author, and is currently penning his new work where he hopes to communicate his deepest hopes and fears, found here.
When asked about how he planned to play down in a future election effort past student shock and horror to some of his famous in class comments, including calling for the extermination of liberals when he boasted that [Note: this is true and actually happened], "One conservative man with an assault rifle can round up 1,000 liberals" (Spring, 2008, moral foundations) and [Note: this is true and actually happened as well] his abhorrent legal advice offered to a thankfully fictitious client before criminal law class where he coached his client to lie as a legal defense before the professor cut him off, pointing it out as a felonious defense and worthy of malpractice, to name only two examples of what became a daily routine, Hamilton shrugged. "The Student Senate acquitted me after I attacked the alumni, professors and classmates by name on my blog, not to mention the remarks I made about women, liberals, and everyone who doesn't agree with me, so what would they do if I started calling for modern day concentration camps or incurring legal malpractice? Probably not a whole lot."
When Hamilton was further pressed, while he was changing clothes to prepare for an afternoon field exercise, on how someone who has contributed so much to the school's ballooning student retention and recruitment problems, he laughed, clutching his signature kalashnikov rifle. He launched into his rhetoric, "Look, I'm not a mathematicstian [sic], I just do what my gut tells me. And if that destroys a multi million dollar institution, or pummels morale into the ground then so be it. I don't feel that I should be held accountable for my actions." When asked the followup question of what he turns to when his "gut" leads him astray, he responded, "oh, I have a back up system or two in case of that, but so far I've never been wrong so I haven't had to use them."
Silent Majority has learned that he has also spent time in Scandanavia raising funds for his next bid at the SBA presidency should he return. He is now receiving direct advice from a new spiritual advisor, that he was careful to point out supplements but does not supplant his old spiritual advisor, and will be implementing new tactics and strategies to woo the incoming class of 2011.
Amongst students, faculty and staff the talk of Senator Hamilton's possible return has provoked a seemingly uniform reaction.
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